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Having been injured by the praying mantis, I was absent for as many as two days. I took up the field bee work again once I had recovered. As soon as the sun started to shine in the morning, I left the castle with the first Q and other fellow bees. But today, the first Q was flying too slowly.  How come?I decided to slow down and fly slowly side by side with the first Q. We were soon at the very back of the swarm. "What's up?" "Perhaps I'm too tired." The fellow bees up ahead were finding flowers and descending down towards them in small groups. "You should have taken a rest with me." "I'm not allowed to do that." "Why?" "I can't tell you while we're still airborne. You might end up crashing again. Let's go down for a landing." "But what about the flowers?" I had become a bee in spirit. I didn't feel like landing at a place where there were no flowers. At that point, some of the bees ahead of us suddenly started going into a sharp nosedive. "Those are persimmons" The first Q seemed to have spotted the same flowers. We were relieved to change our heading and rest our wings on the large smooth leaves of persimmons. "Oh, the nectar looks very fresh." The first Q tried to nudge her way down between the petals of the persimmon flowers. "What was it you wanted to talk about?" I asked her. The first Q looked around with restless eyes and "I know we should probably be doing the work first..." she started with some hesitation. "Have you ever thought about why I invited you here to live as a honeybee?" I remained silent. The first Q spoke slowly as she stared at me, instead of acting in her usual restless way. "I hear the former queen was eager to improve the world of honeybees. So she often held conferences in the hall. Honeybees living in the wild in ancient times had to do everything to make their own homes. But nowadays, the humans prepare splendid castles for us. The queen bee is dedicated to laying her eggs, and the worker bees nurse the larvae and collect nectar and pollen. But the worker bees have lost the ability to think on their own. They do nothing but work and die from overwork. Why was this? The queen wanted to ask a human what the reason for this was." "And then what happened?" "At that time, I was a newborn indoor worker bee and knew little of these things. I could not fly at the time of hiving off so I was unable to follow her. I started working outside and saw many fellow bees die. Now I feel I understand something about what she meant. This is why I decided to let a human experience the life of a honeybee. You were chosen to be the one to experience this." "But why did you choose me?" "It was due to telepathy. My antennas seem to have functioned effectively." "Does this have anything to do with my intention to write a story about honeybees?" "Of course." "If you can think that way, there is still hope for honeybees to..." "To think." "Right" "But, thinking honeybees have all followed the former queen. The present queen feels that honeybees are happier when they are not thinking on their own, it seems. I would therefore like for you to make a honeybee's story out of your experience." "I understand." "But you cannot know the real experience unless you become a honeybee through and through. You still have the heart of a human." The first Q ended her talk and flew away from the leaf of persimmon in her usual restless way. She plunged her head into a largest flower she could find. By that point, I had come to think that honeybees seldom talked except when necessary. I was much surprised by her earnest talking. But there in the bright sun, I really had no time to think of anything except my work. "I must get to work." I thought I hurried into the flowers. I knew how to suck up the nectar and move from flower to flower with the appropriate timing. My stomach was filled with nectar. When I came upon the flower the first Q had been working on, I flew there with my heavy body. "Why don't you come home with me?" The first Q bottom was sticking out from between four petals, but she did not respond. "Hey, let's start back for the castle." But she did not respond. "Yes, let's go back together." answered a honeybee on another flower. "Hey Q!" I shook her body together with the flower but Q did not move. Was she...?I plunged my head down between the petals. No!The first Q was dead with her mouth on a pistil. "Let's hurry up and head back." The bee called to me. "But Q is..." I said as I raised my head up from the flower. She asked "Dead?" When I responded with the yes, she said without any emotion: "Then let's head back now." I remained silent in my confusion. "OK, then. I'll see you at the castle." The other bee said coldly and flew away. Yes. I have to carry the nectar back too.Thinking as a worker bee, I was feeling impatient. Still, I didn't feel like leaving Q, my friend. I fluttered my wings once but rested them on a persimmon tree at a distance. Many of our fellow bees were collecting nectar here. Bees that had collected nectar were flying away in silence, in twos and threes. I was impatient to get back to the castle but couldn't fly. Buzz...buzz... A small noise of wings came from beneath the tree. "...What?" I jumped down and saw a bee from Room Q quivering her wings, utterly exhausted on an azalea flower. "I..." The Q died without finishing what she was saying. The first Q had said that she came to invite me to live the life of a honeybee so that I would be able to write a story of honeybees in a human language...But my mind was filled with the vision of those two honeybees that had died right in front of me. I might be dead in near future?As the first Q said, if indeed this story wouldn't really be complete unless the author had become a honeybee through and through, then my having succeeded in telling the story up to now is due to the fact that I am indeed a honeybee. But if it is really true that I have become a honeybee through and through, then it should be impossible for me to be the only honeybee to live for an entire year in the castle. When I realized this, I suddenly became uneasy. What if I were to die without seeing my father, grandfather and grandmother...? And my mother...?I wanted to live. I didn't promise Q that I would write a complete story. The story could end halfway. I could be back at the garden of my house where this story started. I made up my mind and flew up into the sky in haste. "The castle was in that direction. So my house should be in this direction." I thought. Since becoming a honeybee, it has become easy for me to quickly figure out where I am simply by looking at the sun. So, with the swishing of my wings, I took off. I flew straight toward my home. It had been one and a half months since I had left home at the end of April. Since becoming a field bee, I had kept track of the time by observing the changes in the flowers. Rape blossoms, Chinese milk vetch, clover, persimmon. But I knew nothing about the days of the week. If today was a day other than Saturday or Sunday, my father would be working in the factory at this time of the day. I flew and flew onward but could not find my house. "What...?" I looked up at the sun and reckoned the directions again. "The castle was in that direction. My home should be in this direction. Swish, swish went my wings. "Something was strange..." Perhaps because I thought that I had wanted to get back home in the middle of my story, my honeybee intuition was off. I was utterly tired and decided to land in a clover field and rest my wings for a while. After that, I flew up several times but still couldn't find my home. I gave up and flew away from there. I headed back for the castle feeling sad about parting with Q and for other reasons. But I didn't forget to collect some more persimmon nectar. |
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